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048: Dear Universe, I'd Like to Introduce 'Dogs With Jobs'

Updated: Dec 15, 2023

For as long as I can remember I have wanted to write and publish a children’s book. When I was on maternity leave, four years ago with my first daughter, Charlotte, I had all of this unused and untapped creativity that I would normally have poured into my work that was just kind of sitting there, idle. So my thinking about writing a children’s story turned into actually getting it done. Therefore, I wrote this story years ago, but now feels like the right time to share it with the world. And the process was pretty cool. I wrote this first children’s book pretty much in one sitting. Once I started to get going it was really hard to stop. It was exhilarating. There was lots of editing that was done after the fact but it was a whirlwind wave of creativity that I rode for as long as I could.

The book is the first in a series called Dogs With Jobs. Who doesn’t love an anthropomorphized canine companion who's got loads of ambition? As you’ll hear in a minute, the very first book in this series is all about Frank, the hog doggingist dachshund entrepreneur who is forced to get creative when competition encroaches upon his hot dog stand; rival business literally popping up on every corner. Target market, the importance of differentiation and clear communication make an appearance. More importantly, it’s fun limerick-style prose is sing-songy and expressive to read. I’ll try to do Frank justice. To set the stage for the opening of this book, Frank the dachshund is being interviewed about his successful hot dog business by local poodle reporter, Clara Suneet. This is part of a series (Dogs with Jobs) in which this local roving rover news team reports on local talent.

Let’s get to the good stuff. I’m putting my work out via this podcast and into the universe... so universe, if you’re listening, I’d really love to publish this children’s book. Now on with the show! Presenting Dogs with Jobs: Frank the Entrepreneur.

We’re live in 5, 4, 3, 2, 1…

[Poodle newscaster, Clara Suneet, is reporting live - interviewing Frank, the dachshund]

This is Clara Suneet live on the street,

reporting for Channel News 4.

Let me introduce you to one fine young pooch whose job is anything but a bore.

His name is Francesco (it’s ‘Frank’, for short) and you can find him at Newport & Dover.

He’s a risk-taking pup who sells hot dogs and such

to folks who flock from all over.

[picture of seagulls flying in and lining up at Frank’s hot dog stand.]

Ever since Frank was a little wee mutt

he’s had grand desire.

To own his own cart and use his big heart

to serve hot dogs right off the fire.

And the day finally came when his life would change,

his idea was brought to fruition.

This rover’s roving business became the manifestation

of his hearty ambition.

Relish and mustard and ketchup and custard,

were all toppings for me and for you.

But with all his success others were quick to address,

that they should set up shop too.

Frank had a dilemma when someone named Gemma

opened shop across the street.

Then Harry, then Lainey (who’s really quite brainy)

opened two other places to eat.

[Four hot dog vendors on four corners of the street]

“What a disaster! I was the master,

but now I’m just one of four plates.

There are so many choices, a cacophony of voices…

I have to differentiate!”

So Frank thought and thought and although distraught

he knew that he had to push through.

He would preserve and soon he would cheer

with a new plan on which he could chew.

And what he devised was really quite wise,

with excitement he leaped and he twirled.

He stepped up his game, stood up and exclaimed:

“Come get your hot dogs from around the world!”

[Frank balancing on boxes/crates high above the crowd and his hot dog stand.]

“Want thai in a hurry, get the dog with green curry!”,

he proclaimed from the top of his lungs.

“That dog with poutine is anything but routine!”

The words spun quickly across his tongue.

“Try your luck with some peking duck!”

An original dog, that’s for sure.

“Sushi and tacos and pizza and nachos!”

For his business he’d found the cure.

So I’d like to thank this hot dog named Frank

who cooked up a master plan.

Now tune in for more Channel News 4,

back to you in the studio, Dan!

Okay Universe, what did you think? You know what, never mind. Time will tell what you think. I had fun writing it, I have fun reading it and my creative bucket is filled coming up with new ideas for the Dogs with Jobs series. (Josie the Labradoodle Cartoonist is in the works as we speak…) Thanks, Universe, for listening and helping me fulfill the dreams of my childhood self.

Music: Podington Bear - Racoon Family Robinson

Talk Paper Scissors Theme Music: Retro Quirky Upbeat Funk by Lewis Sound Production via Audio Jungle

Dachshund in a Box: Photo by Erda Estremera on Unsplash

Boat Origami Photo: Boat Origami Photo by Alex on Unsplash

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